Inspired by Joe’s recent post, allow me a few on screen inches in the telling of my own tale of sonic perturbation.
I have tinnitus. It is a fate that I imagine to be somewhere between the having of hemorrhoids and mild eczema. Generally, I place my acquisition of this disorder somewhere in the fall of 2002, after seeing a (pretty exceptional) Black Dice concert, and not being able to hear quite properly afterwards. It escapes me whether or not I had this irritation beforehand, likely it’s in part a product of living in New York City, listening to too much music on headphones, and seeing altogether too many noise shows in reverberant basements. Occasionally I like to dream that it is the product of my wisdom teeth coming in, or my having some exotic jaw disorder, but the likelihood of either of these being the cause is low. Fuck.
For a quick reference, think about what would it be like if Sachiko M was perpetually playing a solo concert in one’s skull. Take the changes in timbre and stretch them out across days, and add as her collaborators the 7 train grinding away above 65th st, low traffic moans and emergency sirens. Every day is a study in contrasts; the noise of the city plays against the high pitched whirring and subsides, leaving the sine pulse space for a long solo while I’m working in the library.
Yes, it is massively annoying. For whatever reason, it is more difficult to tune out than other constant sounds that my body makes - respirating, heart thumping, etc, and seems to pop to attention in my aural field very regularly. It’s odd to think of a sound that’s produced by the hearing mechanism itself. Maybe ignorance of those common body sounds is hardwired, but we’re still programmed to respond to alien frequencies such as these with suspicion? It feels always foreign, maybe I’ll get used to it sometime down the road, but as for now, this seems not likely.
But in all of this chagrining, an interesting thing has happened. The process of constantly paying attention to my hearing, partially to prevent further hearing damage, has given me closer understanding of the subtleties of my aural experience of the world. I’m paying better attention to what sounds are making it in through the ears, and which ones come from vibration through other parts of my body (considering that I spend about 1 ½ hours everyday on subways and platforms, there’s more of this variety of experience than you’d think.) I didn’t realize how many there are, leaning your head onto the metal poles, windows and walls turns your head into a big contact microphone, you get the feeling that you’re hearing every imperfection of the metal of the tracks, all of the quirks of the brakes, the way the window sits in its molding, etc. And in trying to filter out the actual sound of the tinnitus from both the hum of the computer and from the music on (in this case Coelacanth’s “Mud Walls”, a fine piece of music) is worthwhile as well. I get a sense of the space that the music is taking up in the room - since in this case my head is higher than my speakers, the “high” sounds are from in-ear, and the “low” ones are from the record.
So, rather than push me away from listening, tinnitus has made me a better listener. This probably is due to the poverty of my faculty of discerning listening, but whatever works, I guess.
The body in rebellion is a terrible thing. But the body lives, in part, to rebel, doesn't it?
I've had a few other people tell me that their own cases of tinnitus prevent them from enjoying Sachiko's and Nakamura's work. It is even conceivable that the sounds, trough to crest, cancel each other out, and one living with this condition can play WEATHER SKY and "hear" mostly silence.
Jon will be the person to answer this, I think... I wonder if musicians like Nakamura, Rowe, Yoshihide, Muller, Drumm etc. commonly wear ear-plugs or other protective gear when they play. It seems to me that the music these individuals are making must be so closely observed as it unfolds / develops that the wearing of ear-plugs would interfere with one's ability to perform in this idiom. I also have to wonder what the long-term effects of exposure to these "harsh" electronic sounds will have on some of these artists.
Finally, more info on tinnitus (Nirav -- do you know if it is classed as a primarily neurological disorder? What sort of side effects come with it: nausea, blurred vision, motor imbalance? I see also that there is a form of "objective" tinnitus which is actually "audible to other people in addition to the sufferer") is available at:
http://www.bixby.org/faq/tinnitus.html
(BTW, the ATA sells a compaxt disc entitled SOUNDS OF TINNITUS, feturing "[a] 24-minutes conversation between actor Peter Graves and audiologist Donna Wayner, Ph.D., answer[ing] the questions tinnitus patients most often ask their health providers. A separate 30-minute track provides tinnitus-like sounds to help bridge the gap between those who experience tinnitus and those who don't." (http://www.ata.org/resources/)
I don't think any of those musicians wear earplugs, and I also don't think it's the type of sounds that are made that are damaging, it's mostly the volume (I might be somewhat wrong on this, but I also doubt that there have been many scientific studies done on the long-term effects of high-pitched electronics on the ear). I do know that Toshi can hear frequencies that most people can't, more than Otomo or Sachiko even, it was interesting to master the box set recordings with them in Tokyo. most people lose some of their dynamic range as they get older, but Toshi's is still very impressive in his early forties.
one of the MIMEO musicians made a good albeit obvious point to me in an e-mail recently, when I asked about how they remembered the Caravaggio concert, specifically in terms of volume:
"if you hate a certain sound it will seem loud much sooner. sometimes it just SOUNDS loud, because of the quality of the specific sound, but if you measure it by decibels it might prove you wrong."
Nirav, you're a far better listener than almost anyone I know, even with your tinnitus, if that helps at all. that being said, I'm personally glad I've mostly avoided "noise shows in reverberant basements", largely for this very reason. I used earplugs for the first time a few weeks ago, when my friend dragged me to Ozzfest, and I really don't see the point of making the effort to attend a show if you're going to use them, as all nuance in the music is necessarily lost.
Posted by: jon abbey at August 12, 2004 9:04 AMActually, the tinnitus doesn't stop me from enjoying sinewave music at all. It'd be an interesting phenomena for tinnitus waves to cancel out other waves, but if that were so, I'd expect conversation to become difficult as well - lots of sibillant sounds would probably be lost. Actually what generally makes it worse is low-frequencies, from what I understand these are the most potentially damaging to your ears. After a night in the club (not that they're very often) the ringing is often worse than the attendant hangover.
Joe, I don't think it's a neurological disorder, I'd say it's probably a general auditory disorder, in that suspect causes are localized in the ear/jaw area, and the bone/muscle structure therein. One interesting effect is that when I clamp down with my jaw, I get a temporary spike in the volume (though no change in frequency) of the wave. From my experience only, there haven't been any noteworthy side effects, just the ringing. I wonder if insurance would cover a trip to the audiologist?
Posted by: Nirav at August 12, 2004 12:15 PM"For a quick reference, think about what would it be like if Sachiko M was perpetually playing a solo concert in one’s skull. Take the changes in timbre and stretch them out across days, and add as her collaborators the 7 train grinding away above 65th st, low traffic moans and emergency sirens. Every day is a study in contrasts; the noise of the city plays against the high pitched whirring and subsides, leaving the sine pulse space for a long solo while I’m working in the library."
Sounds pretty good to me. What are you complaining about? You never need buy a CD ever again! ;~)
Imagining Jon at Ozzfest...
Posted by: Alastair at August 12, 2004 12:41 PM"one of the MIMEO musicians made a good albeit obvious point to me in an e-mail recently, when I asked about how they remembered the Caravaggio concert, specifically in terms of volume:
"if you hate a certain sound it will seem loud much sooner. sometimes it just SOUNDS loud, because of the quality of the specific sound, but if you measure it by decibels it might prove you wrong.""
- do we get to know who said that, Jon?
No damn wonder y'all got tinnitus if you listen to Prurient albums all the time :))
cheers kids I'm off on holiday for ten days
ps Otomo's Jazz Quintet set (with Mats Gustafsson - about as far as you can from Sachiko M) at Jazz em Agosto in Lisbon was fucking AWESOME.
Hey man, noise is like strong spirits. Great in moderation, but with too much, you end up with a headache the next morning.
Posted by: Nirav at August 12, 2004 10:44 PMI really wanna see Otomo's NJQ too!!!
you're lucky Dan
Was Gustasfon kinda replacing Harth basically?
Now that Harth has replaced Kikuchi, is that it?
I wonder how it sounds?
it's true that you lose the ability to hear certain (high pitched) frequencies as you get older. something i always wondered: "weather sky" is probably one of the best erstwhile releases, i think we all agree on that. the interesting thing is that toshi plays a lot of extremely high pitched frequencies (i'd say a lot of 12'000 hz and above) that i'm pretty sure keith can't hear. so what exactly does keith hear when playing with toshi? i suspect he focuses mostly on all the audio artifact "cracking" kind of noises? or maybe i'm completely wrong? but technically keith should not be able to hear much of those very high sounds.
Posted by: tomas at August 13, 2004 3:54 AMA long time ago I was chatting with a friend who had tinnitus. He went to a doctor who explained he's got it because his hearing is very sensitive, and in some respects, it's just 'knocked it down' to a more normal level.
I've had very mild tinnitus for a while, mostly just on the low-hiss level. It bursts into a thin tone if I'm drunk, tired, have had coffee, things which are known to aggravate it. A couple years ago I had a hearing test when I started a new job, and I still scored well above average. Hooray! I've saved the chart printout for future use as album artwork someday ;)
I've often thought that the increasing popularity of drone-based music, whether its high sine-tones or low swoons, could be attributed to higher numbers of participants having tinnitus. That is, they have tinnitus, and thus they like hearing drones. There must be some small amount of modulation going on between the tone in your head and that of the music, and it could be quite enjoyable, as well as comforting to be in the company of other constant tones. In a field of dots, the straight line is very noticeable. In a plane of lines, it becomes part of the pattern. (That sounds like a fortune cookie.)
I've been told 4.5kHz is the first frequency that starts to go with hearing damage.
Extreme Tinnitus can certainly manifest a psychological disorder, as people struggle to cope with the constant noise in their head, sometimes driven suicidal. One of the urban myths in my high school was that William Shatner nearly lost his mind to extreme tinnitus. Brings to mind those mind-controlling ear-insects from Wrath of Kahn.
I always wear earplugs to rock shows, and enjoy them. Sure, there's some nuance lost, but in many cases you couldn't reduce the volume enough so not to require earplugs without also reducing the physicality of the sound, nor without forcing the drummer to hit like a baby. In improv it's really hard, especially as a player because of the great dynamic range and detail. I generally don't wear them at improv shows, though I'm still surprised when I see people like Eddie Prevost on full kit, playing for 40 minutes with no earplugs. Just keep up a constant cymbal wash for a short while at a drumset, and your ears are already starting to go.
Michael
M
Posted by: Michael Rodgers at August 13, 2004 4:46 AMTinnitus sounds like a terrible thing, but the notion that it could actually make someone a *better* listener is an intriguing one…
Safe & relaxing travels, Dano. How was the confab with George Lewis? Did you get to tinker around with the palm pilot version of Voyager?
“One of the urban myths in my high school was that William Shatner nearly lost his mind to extreme tinnitus.”
Could this be the culprit behind his decisions to cover “Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds”/ “Mr Tambourine Man” & stump travel deals as resident Priceline.com shill? (looks like Nimoy’s set to usurp the soapbox if recent commercials are any indication)
I think I get that low hissing when I'm drunk, but nothing constant. Few improv gigs get above 120 decibels, so I don't wear earplugs as either a player or a listener, if it gets up where I think it's stupid, I go to the bar. An old friend of mine when I was 15 (he was 13) was a saxophone player, and already had tinnitus from practicing loud in confined spaces, that's rough.
Posted by: Nat at August 13, 2004 9:11 PMMild tinnitus here in the left ear, I think due to a proneness to ear infections (not noise--most concerts I go to aren't that loud). Currently I have a slight cold & now both ears are going. But it's only an issue when I'm listening to insanely quiet music.
I should say that Good Morning Good Night does set it off bigtime after about an hour or so, even at relatively low volumes.
Well, that's life: wear-&-tear. You work around it.
Posted by: N.D. at August 13, 2004 10:44 PM.................................................. © 2003 - 2006 bagatellen ..................................................